Karma

Joe is constantly telling Jaynie not to stand on chairs. "Jaynie! What are chairs for?!" (answer: "for sitting") is something you hear around here all the time.

Today she climbed up onto her little frog chair, and Joe asks "Jaynie? What is that you're standing on?" and without missing a beat she says "A stool." Yup. Not a chair, cause that would be against the rules. It was clearly a chair-shaped stool.

So I turn my head and am trying to laugh as quietly as possible, but I guess I didn't go undetected because next she says "You're killing me, Mommy!"



It was right about then that the chair tipped over and she fell on her head on the wood floor. 5 minutes, many tears, and a popsicle later Joe asks her "Jaynie - do you know what karma is?"

A Whole New World

Today I bribed Jaynie with M&M's so she'd entertain her brother while I showered. It's not the first time I've done this, either. It's not something I'm proud of, but at least I'm clean.

When we first brought Jonas home, I spent a lot of time and energy into keeping him safe from her. Never leaving them together in a room unattended. If I had to use the bathroom or switch loads of laundry or whatever, I would either bring Jaynie with me or make sure Jonas was in a room she couldn't get into. Now I'm lugging his exersaucer into her room, announcing that he's going to watch her play while I take a shower, and asking her to "come get me if he starts crying". Amazing.

(She did a pretty good job of keeping him entertained, too. She was pretending to be Miss Cathy (the leader of her guided playgroup) and all her stuffed animals were "the other kids". She was doing "Happy and You Know It" when I left the room. Jonas thinks she's great.)

About 5 min. into my shower she barged into the bathroom and started telling me an elaborate story about her elephant (named Manny, thanks to Ice Age 2). I interrupted and told her to go tell the story to Jonas - she was supposed to be watching him. She looks me in the eye and says "That's crazy talk, Mommy." Honestly. I don't know where she gets these things.

(It was right about then that I said "If you go back in there and keep him happy, I'll give you TWO M&M's!" She looked at me for a beat, said "Oh, OKAY!" and ran off. When I found them she was singing Wheels on the Bus and he was laughing and drooling.

Slacker Mom

It's been pointed out that I haven't updated in quite some time. While I was posting my defense (potty training one while nursing another doesn't leave a lot of blog-posting time) (which is really a shame because it does make for LOTS of blog-worthy stories) Jaynie (who was in her crib supposedly napping) pooped in her diaper, TOOK IT OFF, then started yelling for me that she had to poop in the potty. When I got down there she had already peed and was really upset about it. So she's standing on wet sheets, crying because she didn't make it to the potty, then points to her diaper and says "There's poopy in there." Yeah. This is why the blog is slowing down.

Like Princess Jewelianana!

Jaynie has this book - "Princess Jeweliana and the Sparkling Rainbow Ball" (pronounced "Jewelianana" by the Twink.) She loves it. It's the favorite right now. She insists on having it read before every nap, and at bedtime each night.

It never occurred to us that she didn't know what a "ball" was, until she turned to Joe one night and asked for a "sparkly rainbow ball - like Princess Jewelianana!"

The next day I was in Target and as I walked past the big bin of playground balls, I spotted a swirly multi-colored one buried under the solids. I had to stick practically my entire body in there to get to it, but it found it's way home.

Jaynie took one look at it and squealed "It's a sparkly rainbow ball! Like Princess Jewelianana! THANK YOU, MOMMY!"

I did good. =)

Domestic Goddess

This morning I pulled a Colorform out of the dryer. It's perfectly fine, just cleaner than when it went in.

A couple of weeks ago a binky fell out with the clean laundry. I have to assume it was hiding in a pocket. Washed and dried.

The winner, however, would have to be this entry by Joe (when I was telling him about the binky...) "That's nothing! Last week I found an empty Diet Coke can in the washer when I went to switch loads!"

Good thing we're so careful about seperating our loads. Whites, colors, aluminum cans...

The day the changing table bit the dust...

Some days, life with the kidlets is so smooth and easy and fun. Some days, they don't let me eat or go to the bathroom. I was having one of the latter.

Jonas was awake way past nap time, and was screaming bloody murder. I thought he was just overtired, and was trying everything in my Mommy arsenol to get him to go to sleep. After watching him start to doze off then wake back up and scream some more approximately 13 times, it occurred to me to figure out what was bothering him. In a word? Poop.

So now I've got a clean, dry, severely cranky and overtired baby on my hands. I'm bouncing him on the ball, and he's falling asleep for real when Jaynie comes running in, yelling "ARE YOU SLEEPING YET, BABY JONAS? ARE YOU TAKING YOUR NAP???" Sigh.

So after a few of these helpful conversations, I start begging her. "Please. Please Jaynie. Please just go play in your room for a few minutes. Please."

She runs off, Jonas starts dozing, I put him in the bed and start to sneak out of the room. Two things happen - 1) Jonas starts screaming ("How DARE you leave me in this room alone! Get your boobs back in here!"), and I spot Madam standing on top of her changing table. Needless to say, Jonas lost out on that one.

I rush in and survey the situation. Seems that even though we removed the shelf from the table months ago after she figured out how to climb it, she can now get up there again. We have a little shelf mounted on the wall above it where we keep diapers, wipes, creams, etc. She was reaching up, trying to open the wipes, when I got there. I told her no and put my hand on the box... and came away with a very greasy hand.

I look at it. It's covered in Vaseline. Uh oh.

I look at her. She has two handfuls, its all over her face, in her hair, and on her shirt. She says to me, and I quote... "I need a wipe!"

Yeah - it's funny now. At the time, with Jonas screaming bloody murder in the next room? Not so freaking funny. Sometimes I worry that I might actually not survive this Mommy thing. I suspect they're trying to kill me. Slowly.

Actual conversation...

Jaynie: Baby Jonas is a little Winnie the Pooh!

Me: Oh, he is, is he?

Jaynie: Yes! And Jaynie is a little Tigger!

Me: Mmm hmmm...

Jaynie: And Mommy is a BIG PIGLET!

Me:

Do you know...

the Muffin Man? That lives on Norma Ct?


I freaking love this picture. It's like he's saying "Ha! I got milk boob! I get it whenever I want!" I swear, he's actually taunting Joe in this picture.

He is the sweetest little muffin man on the planet. He's awake and smiley more and more lately, and we're all having a blast with him. The fun thing about baby #2 is, for the first month they really just sleep in the bouncy a lot, which gives you plenty of time to ease baby #1's fears about sharing your attention. Jonas was basically ignored for the first 5 - 6 weeks of his life, unless he was getting fed, changed, or Jaynie was asleep. Even when I was holding him I was paying attention to her. If I so much as looked at him she would start demanding "MOMMY WATCH JAYNIE!!!"

Then, just when she's getting comfortable sharing me, he starts to wake up and pay attention! So much fun! The three of us cuddle and play in the bed together every morning. Both of them wake up in good moods, and there is much smiling and giggling (from her) and cooing (from him) and tearing up (happy mommy tears from me). She loves to sing to him or read him books, and he follows her with his eyes whenever she's in the room. He's always smiling at her, which causes her to yell "Baby Jonas is smiling at Big Sister Jaynie! Baby Jonas LOVES Big Sister Jaynie!" in delight.

Jonas's major drawback is that he has reflux. I cannot begin to describe how tired I am of changing both him and me several times a day. He's like a hot milk dispenser. Or, if it's been a while since he ate and he's had time to work on it a bit - a hot cottage cheese dispenser. What joy.

He sleeps in his hammock for about 5 - 6 hours a night, and in bed with us the rest of the time. This isn't because of him, it's because of me. He wakes up wanting to eat around 2 or 3am, and I bring him to bed then fall asleep feeding him. Hence the co-sleeping. Sometimes (like once in the past 2 weeks) I wake up when he's done and put him back to bed. I'm working on it.

We don't have a room for him in this house because we knew we'd be moving before he turned 6 months old, and he'll be in the hammock for at least that long. I figured why move a bunch of stuff around in the guest room when his hammock fits so nicely next to our bed. Makes night time feedings that much easier, too. Well - then I got to know the wonder that is this noisy sleeping baby. He grunts. He snorts. He randomly babbles. This kid makes more noise while sound asleep between the hours of 9 and 3 then he does for the rest of the day. I may have to look into moving some furniture around. Soon.

He has what we call his "proximity alarm", that goes off when I enter or leave the room. Example - he can be sleeping soundly in the bouncy next to Joe, then I walk in to check on him and 3 seconds later he's stirring and whining and waking up. Whoops. Conversely, I can be laying next to him in bed (not touching - like a foot apart) and he'll be sleeping through Joe and Jaynie coming and going, but if I get up and leave... WAAAH! Sometimes he wakes up if I roll over and put my back to him. (Which makes me wonder if he's not attuned to my location, but the location of my boobs. Hmmm.)

He's already outgrown several 0-3 sized clothing items. Many of which he never actually wore. Sigh. My baby getting bigger already.

He suddenly has chunky thighs. I love them. Little tiny feet, big chubby thighs. Diaper changes are getting longer and longer as I am spending more and more time admiring his feet (usually covered in footie pj's) and chubs.

We're cloth diapering both of them, and I have to say I wish I'd done it when Jaynie was born. CD'ing a newborn is so wonderful. All that runny breastmilk poop that used to escape Jaynie's diaper and get on her clothes, carseat, bed, my lap, my bed, her swing, her playmat, the carpet, the cat, etc - the cloth diaper holds it in, no problem. We have had exactly 2 blowouts, and neither were all that bad (and neither of them were when *I* put on the diaper, so I blame user error instead of the product.) Everyone thinks CD'ing means gross laundry - lemme tell you, I'd rather wash poopy diapers than poopy freaking everything else because the diaper doesn't work. Either way I'm washing poop. W/ CD's, I'm not also scrubbing it out of upholstery. Ok, cloth advertisement over. :)

Well, that's all the time I have for you folks today. Mr. Muffin himself is demanding I get up from this chair and come play with him. How can I resist?

Trick questions

There's an old Calvin and Hobbes strip that is one of my favorites - Calvin's mom walks in on him while he's hammering nails into the coffee table. She shrieks "WHAT ARE YOU DOING???" He looks at her, looks at the nails, looks back at her and asks "Is this a trick question?"

Jaynie does this all the time now. The question "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" has recently been answered with...

Feeding Georgie a Cheerio!
Climbing the chair!
Standing on the table!
Licking the TV! (my favorite)
Sitting in Baby Jonas's chair!
Chasing Victoria!
Going pee-pee on the floor!
Pouring water on the table!
Spitting!
Splashing in the milk! (from her cereal bowl)
Tearing the paper!

Etc, etc. She's a holy terror. She sure is cute, though.

Hey Baby Jonas!

"Hey Baby Jonas! That's (pointing to her own chest) Big Sister Jaynie!"

How cute are these kids, I ask you?


The day after Christmas we all went to the zoo to try and walk walk walk me into labor starting. Apparently it worked, because at about 12:45 (about 3 minutes after I lay down and closed my eyes - nice) my water broke.

Suz was supposed to be there for the birth, but we figured it was already 1am, Jaynie wakes up before 7am, no way was I going to have a baby in less than 6 hours. Right? Right? So we left her there w/ Madam. The plan was once Jaynie woke up a friend would come get her and Suz would meet us at the hospital in time for all the exciting parts.

Well - so much for plans. When we got to the hospital I was already feeling some pretty freaking serious contractions, and the nurse checked and reported that I was at 4cm. Less than an hour later I was at 6cm. I then had one long contraction that lasted about 30 minutes and almost killed me, and at the end of it I was fully dialated.

It was at this point that they called the Dr. and woke him up and told him to get dressed and make the 20 minute drive to the hospital. Yeah, you read that right.

The room was full of nurses telling me not to push, explaining to me how to control myself (yeah, cause blowing out is just as good - who needs to push, anyway), telling me to wait for Dr. Wood, etc. I spent the entire time trying to negotiate with them. Joe does an excellent imitation of this. ("Explain to me why I have to wait for the Dr? You girls look capable of catching a baby. Get your gloves on." They tried to tell me he had to be there in case there was something wrong with the baby. "He's not a pediatrition. You have those on staff. He's just for me, and I'm perfectly happy being in your care. Now, get down there because I'm about to push this baby out.")

Dr. Wood showed up and there was a really funny few seconds where the nurse that had been telling me no no no lifted my leg and started counting like I should be pushing, and I had to tell her that I wasn't having a contraction right then. Then they started again and I got down to business. 3 contractions and he was out. We won't discuss the injury he inflicted on me on the way out. Let's just say I now feel silly for worrying about what form of birth control I was going to use after the baby was born.

Jonas Nathaniel Moore was born at 3:46 am (Yes, for those doing the math - 3 hours after my water broke. Apparently, he was in a hurry.) on Dec. 27, 2005. He weighed 8lbs 12oz, and was the biggest baby in the hospital (considering the fact that I'm currently sitting on a pillow... these women who have 6lb babies may be on to something.) He's 21 inches long, has lots of dark brown hair, dark eyes who's color is still a mystery, and is yummy and smoochable all over.

Joe and I are both amazed at how easy he is to take care of. We seem to recall the first few weeks being absolute hell w/ Jaynie, and now we have this tiny baby who just eats and sleeps and that's really it and we're like "Was she this easy too? Are we better at this this time? Are we remembering wrong?" Seriously - during the first 2 weeks of Jaynie's life we looked at eachother more than once and said "Maybe we only have one kid." How did people do this with a toddler running around? Well, now I know the answer. The toddler is where all your time and energy goes - not the newborn. He wakes up in the morning when Jaynie does, and nurses while she watches some cartoons in Mommy's bed. Then he sits in his vibrating chair while she and I eat breakfast, get dressed, etc. Just when she's starting to wind down from playing, he's ready to eat again so we all go sit on the couch and watch "Sleeping Bluety" while I nurse him. Then he goes back in the chair while she and I have lunch. Then it's nap time for everyone. Jaynie sleeps in her crib, Jonas sleeps either in his hammock or snuggling with me.

When we wake up there is more movie watching/nursing/cuddling action. Then we play until it's time to make dinner. Jonas sits in his chair up on the table and stares at the chandelier while we eat. After dinner it's bathtime for everyone. Jaynie's in the tub and Jonas on the floor getting a sponge bath (he still has the cord thingy.) Joe takes Jaynie, I take Jonas. Jaynie tells me what songs to sing to "make Baby Jonas feel better" if he starts crying. They both get the lotion rub down and pj's on in the bathroom, then we say night-night to Big Sister, and Jonas and I settle in for another nursing session.

Sometimes he goes down then, sometimes he stays up and eats like 4 more times then goes down right before I do. What he does do is sleep sleep sleep. Last night he slept for almost 6 hours before I woke up leaking and had to get him up to eat. I'm not sure what I did to deseve such a good baby, but I'll take it.

Jaynie calls him "Jaynie's Baby Jonas". She gives him pats to the head, holds his hand, gives him kisses on the forehead or "little feeties", wants to hold him, wants him to watch her ("Baby Jonas watch Jaynie!") and in general acts crazy about him. She'll tell you that he's a little baby so he needs "lots of naps, and lots of milk" (sometimes she qualifies that as "lots of milk... from Mommy's boobies!") When he cries she'll tell me "He's so hungry, Mommy! He needs some milk!" The first few times she saw me nurse him she wasn't thrilled about it. She'd lean in close and watch him sucking and start yelling "Stop! Stop!" We're not sure if she thought he was hurting me or what, but she's gotten used to it now. In fact, I think she tries to talk me into nursing him more frequently than he needs it, because she knows it means I'll turn on a movie and cuddle her on the couch.

I am in Mommy heaven. These kids are so yummy, I could just eat them up. Jaynie is still a little trigger happy from my long absence at the hospital. If I could sum up the past few days in 3 words they would have to be "Jaynie HOOOOOOLD Mommy!" But she's starting to mellow out a bit and is more willing to give me room to breathe. My little family of four is having fun.